|California High Desert Sunrise Photo by Jessie Eastland|
In The UnexpectedLegacy of Divorce, Judith Wallerstein mentions “pillow talk.” For happily married couples, the moments before sleep lend themselves to conversation. Couples may share their concerns about their kids, brainstorm solutions, give their perspectives, and strategize together as needed. They can support and encourage each other, pray together, and go to sleep knowing they aren’t parenting alone.
Single parents don’t have this advantage. Serious fears and epiphanies about our children usually surface late at night, and we must field them alone.
I read Psalm 19 recently. “Day to day pours out speech,” writes David, “and night to night reveals knowledge” (verse 2 ESV). The psalm compares the sun to a bridegroom coming out of his chamber and running his course with joy. I believe it’s a metaphor for Christ.
During the day, we’re busy. We observe events and face challenges. We experience joys, sorrows, and plenty of stress. Sometimes, we remember to tune in to God as we go. If we do, we understand that he is speaking through everything that happens. “Day to day pours out speech.”
At night, we reflect. We try to make sense of all we’ve encountered during the day. We ponder, connect the dots, and make plans.
We can defeat our worries for our kids. In the absence of a spouse to share “pillow talk” with, we can tune in to God. “Night to night reveals knowledge.” The Hebrew word for “knowledge” means perception, wisdom, discernment, and skill—things we need for raising kids alone.
Lately, I’ve been taking notes as I pray for my kids. I’ll jot down a Scripture to share with them; a new possibility for schoolwork; or a reminder to specifically praise them for something they’ve done. Connection with God, through prayer and the Bible, gives me the direction I need to guide my children.
Pillow talk. With God.
And we were worried about what, exactly?